With Valentine’s Day approaching, I figured it was a good time to share how my husband and I met and eventually fell in love.

We actually met at the small private high school we both attended and graduated at. Fred is 4 years older than me so I was in 8th grade when he was a senior in high school. I knew of him but he had no clue who I was. He graduated high school in 1995 and received a football scholarship in Delaware.

Shortly after, he got diagnosed with cancer so he returned home for treatment and finished his degree. While he was home, he took on coaching at the high school we both attended. He was my sister’s track coach and would also help as a scorekeeper for her volleyball and basketball games. In the meantime, I was up at UF studying and had a full course load which meant no time for a serious boyfriend. 

Back home, I remember my sister saying that Fred started to go to church with our family and that I should talk to him because he had a lot of questions about God and that I would be a good resource for him. (She also secretly was trying to set us up). But, I kind of blew him off and wanted nothing to do with him. The funny thing is I knew exactly who he was—I had a crush on him since 8^th grade. He was the star quarterback throughout high school and I thought he was so handsome,  but he had been in a serious relationship for 5 years so I just assumed he would marry that girl. Plus he was not a Christian and that was a such a big part of who I was that I knew that would be an obstacle in our relationship. Overtime, however, the Lord opened the door for us to talk.

When I was home for the summer, we ended up working out at the same gym and he had been going to church with my family most of that year, He started attending something called Bible Study Fellowship  (BSF) and decided that he wanted to pursue having a relationship with Jesus. We began to talk more and more and eventually we began dating. Our relationship was long distance at first since I was still going to school full time at UF but thankfully it was only about a 2 hour drive so he would drive up almost every weekend so we could hang out. 

After 3 years of dating, he proposed and we got married a year later. I still remember telling him I didn’t need a real ring because he was teaching and I knew he didn’t have a lot of money to buy a ring. He jokingly proposed with a Ring Pop so every anniversary he still gets me a ring pop to celebrate. This May we will celebrate 18 years of marriage which is hard to believe. Although it has not been easy and we’ve been through a lot of struggles over the course of 21 years together, they have truly been the best years of my life. 

I’m no marriage expert and am constantly learning and growing, but here are a few things I’ve learned along the way:

1. Communication is so important! Talk through things even when it’s hard and ugly. Remember to speak to each other like you did when you were dating.
2. Marriage is 100/100 not 50/50.
3. Date each other
4. Keep God the center of your marriage and take time to pray together every day
5. Don’t let intimacy fall by the wayside—kiss, hold hands, show affection, & text each other you love each other on the regular 

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